Saturday 2 July 2011

0244-0312 3 July 2011 0324

*heaved sigh*

Atilla started crying out while asleep. No amount of stroking or low level murmured words would comfort him, or penetrate his dream.

I picked him up and it seemed to help. His lower half was extremely warm, which was concerning. Investigating further, I surmised the cause to be the hot water bottle at the foot of his bed.

I carried him for as long as I could - given my state of consciousness, state of my back, his slumbering moments.

It was cute in sporadic outbursts: he turned his head from side to side, seeking available feeding comfort (futile effort as he was at my neck height and I received wet kisses).

I anticipate it will become much colder at 5 or 6 am, so I decided to put his woollen trousers on him. My actions brought him to a higher state of wakefulness.

'Nothing for it', I thought to myself (functioning on reduced sleep), 'let's put these on him properly.'

The rough handling corresponded with his full waking.

My time was now pre-occupied with a fussing uncontented Atilla; a change into fresh nappy didn't work and he ought to be good until morning.

I experienced frustration with the situation (Atilla's unsoothable fussiness + my aching back + my want to sleep + my fatigue + my reduced capability to meet Atilla's needs) and annoyance with Atilla because he wasn't going back to sleep.

It was very close.

I named my emotions. I talked through possible actions to take to soothe Atilla, and explained to myself why I didn't act.

Having heard myself out, I decided the case for inaction had less merit than taking action.

I took his new nappy off and put him on his potty. Not a jot. Wriggle wriggle. Some happy coos.

Back he goes on the change mat. Nappy goes back on. Woollen trousers goes back on, with yellow vest tucked in. Pick up. Pat pat on his back. Cuddle.

Check his bedding is suitable for him to lie down to sleep. Hot water bottle not too hot.

Put him in bed. Pat pat. Walk out of the room.

No comments:

Post a Comment