Saturday, 30 June 2012

Flashback: PND moment

Feeling so tired. Too tired to plan a meal. Too tired to brush teeth. Too tired to floss teeth. No time to bathe.

Easier to neither eat nor bathe.

Pain radiating from wrist. Joints still to recover from pregnancy. Still to recover fully from episiostomy. Painful to pick up baby. Cannot leave baby to cry. Cannot pick up baby. Cannot soothe baby.

Always doing laundry - sorting, washing, hanging, bringing them in, sorting, putting away.

Demanding baby.

No time to make food to eat nor make warm drink to drink. No time to eat nor drink.

Feed baby. Burp baby. Clean up after baby reflux.

When to sleep? Need clean house for baby. Want clean house for me.

Hate bathrooms smelling of urine. Cannot bend down to clean spray/splash back.

Husband whines when I ask him to clean my way - spray the damn area and wipe with cloth. He gets out the mop from downstairs and mops the whole floor. Nice, thorough. But you have to clean the floor each time it gets dirty - either urine or milk splash. He whines and grumbles. I don't ask him anymore. I ignore dirty bathroom as often as I can until I can't stand the stain on my life, and I spray, bend down and wipe. My crotch hurts. My waist hurts.

I didn't know being a new mother was like this.

Thanks goodness I have a loving husband, a great sister, a supportive father and mother and mother-in-law.

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